Two years, 5 months. That’s how long I’ve been dancing. 155 classes. I know this because I’m a (former) distance cyclist and still write down every workout. It’s a habit I can’t break. I started dancing at the youthful age of 38. Now I’m 41, and I’m looking in the mirror for the first time in 3 months. It’s terrifying. My tights are cutting me in half and my leo is struggling to hold everything in place. It’s terrifying, but it’s honest.
Years of physical activity and a healthy diet didn’t prepare me for this. For what would happen if I took some time off. If for a couple months I didn’t have time to go to the studio, and spent dinners shoving a sandwich in to my mouth instead of steaming broccoli. It didn’t prepare for the stress eating and too many glasses of wine I would inhale while managing my husband’s run for political office. I wasn’t prepared for this.
But here I stand, assessing the damage. Terrified that I’ve forgotten everything (are my feet too fat for my slippers? Do my legwarmers make my legs look like sausages?). The studio is cool. It’s November. My last class was on September 9th, and it was hot and sticky. When did the weather change?
I rest my hands lightly on the barre, and look in the mirror. Stretch my feet. Attempt a shallow demi-plié. So far so good. The teacher walks in. Not just any teacher, my first teacher. The one I go back to when I’m feeling insecure, or need a little encouragement. The one who was there for my very first class. The one who said “Of course you can dance.”
The music starts and I take one last look in the mirror. Of course I can dance. The music starts and I feel it in my heart, and I dance. It’s good to be back.
- Lori Trublood
What a lovely blog. I adore my adult students. There's nothing quite like the dedication of an adult dancer. :) #keepdancing
ReplyDeleteLovely, this reminds me of the very first adult ballet class I took a few years ago. :)
ReplyDeleteLove this. In fact, reading this post inspired me to begin my own ballet blog and get back to the barre after a few months' break! Thank you xx
ReplyDeleteOh goodness, how embarrassing. The blog is so new that I got its name wrong... haha
DeleteWhen I'm feeling insecure I go to my very first ballet teacher too. There seems to be great comfort going back to where it all started.
ReplyDeleteThat's passion. We'll simple go back to something we love to do. Dancing never tires you as long as you want it. It'll make you happy. Just like kids, they'll just dance and dance. Maybe kids should also try Children’s Dance Classes Phoenix.
ReplyDeleteOh my gosh... this is the exact feeling I had yesterday when I went back to class finally after a long time. I couldn't even get my leo or tights ON, much less know how much they would've struggled to hold things together. My muscles remembered how though, and I got through the class with minimal shenanigans. I wish I could've gone back to my first ballet teacher, but she is half a world away! I'm glad you went back. :)
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